letter to my brother

Dear A

I was watching a movie set in New York..  and I thought of you.

I have been to New York only once, 20 years ago, and it was with you...  Whenever I think of  happier us, a healthy you, I always think of our Uni days in States.  I guess we have never properly spent time with each other until we were in States.  We shared the same house, go to the same school, and that was the first time I truly got to know you as a father, brother, a friend.

You are a sweet, smart, and kind man.  But I guess sometimes, in life, we forget who we are and we do things we know are wrong.

You took excellent care of me when I wa there, making sure I didnt't fall into bad hands.  Thank you. it may not have been 100percent perfect, but hey, you did your best as a 20 year old and it was a great responsibility.

you have made my days there very enjoyable, with trips to Reno, Tahoe, Las Vegas, LA, NY, ... I may not have known then, but I was truly blessed and happy.

Over the years, we are engrossed with our own problems, are hardened by disappointments, are hurt with careless words and unintentional actions.... and sensitive remarks... but, I can truly truly tell you that I have always sincerely loved and cared about you... and I may have done s few things you disagree here and there... and vice versa, but I have never changed thebwaybI feel for you or G.

Maybe men are more hardened and unforgiving in matters of the heart... maybe my actions and words on the past have caused you and G to distrust me.  I can only say I am sorry now.  I cannot take back the words I said or undo certain things.  I am sorry.

I love the two of you very much. I wish I can do more for you... I feel your pain and your joy.  And sometimes, I wish  I can turn back time, to happier days, happier times, happier places.... and enjoy them in isolation... not knowing about the past, and not worrying about the future....

I wish you thinknof me as much as I think of you...
And when you do, I hope the happy times are the ones that come to your mind....


love,
little sister